Continuing minimalism

How to continue minimalism once you’ve done the initial purge? At the moment the cupboards are clean and the flat looks like it’s had a decent de-clutter but I want to extend the impact further than that. I am itching to start getting rid of some of our bigger pieces, the futon being the first to go. However, we have a friend of my boys staying over for a week around the wedding and everybody’s been telling us how handy it is to have somewhere for a guest to sleep. I am trying to motivate to my boy that instead of the futon which takes up a lot of space all the time (and looks quite scruffy) maybe we could buy, or heavens forbid, borrow a nice blow-up air mattress for when people stay over since all in all it’s only a couple of times a year. No success yet so it’s something else I have to try and ignore (still doing that for my boys desk as well).

So rather a re-focusing on me then since my fiancé is not convinced yet. As mentioned before I am quite happy with my slimmed down wardrobe. I am nowhere near the 33 items of Project 333 but I am happy with the current state of affairs and want to see if I can work with it as is for a while. To that end I’ve decided to not buy any new cloths for 1 year. Since I’ve not bought anything since I’ve started trimming down I have set the start date at 1 August 2013. I will thus endeavour to not buy any new clothing until 1 August 2014. This will include accessories such as scarves, belts, shoes, jewellery and even hand bags (another personal weakness).

This is somewhat complicated, and I am sure I will often be tempted, as part of my job is to occasionally visit retail shops. I stand in shops and look at the lighting, making sure the merchandise looks good and the window displays and entries are inviting. I’ve been on site three times since this experiment started and it is difficult to ignore the items hanging around and not make a mental note to come back after hours for a decent look. I am an avid shopper so it is a bit tough. All the minimalist websites say to avoid shops and the temptation, which is not possible for me so I will just have to rely on will-power.

Even writing this now I am thinking about going out to get a new pair of jeans. I ripped my favourite pair and in an attempt at frugality I bought and iron-on patch to cover the hole. Unfortunately the iron was too hot and the patch melted leaving a colourful streak all over my jeans. Gaaah, disaster! Not sure if I can rescue them and sad since they were my live-in pants. I will have to see if I can still salvage them. After the iron incident I just stuffed them at the bottom of my closet as I was too upset to face them for a while. I wonder if anyone else does that.

A good evening

My good day continued on into the evening. I did a quick blitz clean when I got home, it’s much easier now to stay on top of house cleaning and after about 30min it was all back to how it should be. Since Id had some good music on in the car on the drive home I was still singing along to all the tunes while doing the housework. I then sprayed a layer of varnish on my wedding shoes (an old pair I’ve updated by coating them in glitter). I picked a whole bunch of lemons off the tree outside. I’m so glad we have that tree, it’s got loads of lemons on it at the moment and no one else in the complex seems to be using them. I then studied a chapter, had dinner (which my boy cooked), baked a quick lemon cake and went back to studying while it was in the oven. At 9.40 I stopped and offered my boy a massage as he’d had a terrible day and I wanted to mellow him out. I often give him a massage in the evening since he suffers from cropped up tension in his lower back and shoulders. Poor thing, he is too invested in his job and finds it hard not to take everything to heart. I love that about him, that he cares so much but it does make him a bit vulnerable. After that I climbed into bed and read for a while before going to sleep.

All in all a good evening. Well balanced between the things I have to do; cleaning and studying, those I want to do; reading and baking, and those for my relationship; a long conversation over dinner and a massage.

It was a busier night than most though, I don’t think every evening will be like this but I did realise that my boy needs a bit more support right now, he’s having a really tough time at work at the moment and is getting worn down. I like that I can give it to him, it doesn’t even involve a lot of effort. Maybe there’s a lesson there as well, even small actions can have large consequences. I can make him feel so much better by just listening for a few minutes.

I am determined though to free up time in my life for the people around me.

a good day

When I got dressed this morning I found it fairly easy to decide what to wear for a change. I also brushed my hair, tied a ribbon in it, put on some eye-liner and a pair of cute earrings. For me this is huge! I’ve been dragging my feet to get to work the last year or so and usually just ended up in jeans and an anorak (9 times out of 10 the same one). I’d almost never brush my hair or bother to look smart unless I knew we had important clients visiting.

Two weeks ago though we had an upheaval in the office and my one co-worker was finally fired (the sleeping on the job, alcoholic, sexist man ugh). Ever since then it feels like a weight has been lifted in the office and both me and my one left over colleague are much happier and relaxed (its amazing how one pessimist can drag at your well-being! I understand now about cutting toxic people out of your life!). Anyway the week after that I started dressing with more intent. It is much easier to do as well now. My wardrobe has been halved and I have a rule of if I don’t wear it I chuck it which has also meant I am wearing a larger selection of my cloths (because I have some pretty stuff I feel I can’t toss, so must wear!).

I have also given a lot of stuff away to friends which had the added bonus of now when I was looking for a white cardigan for the wedding one has already offered to lend me hers. Hmmm that had me thinking, for special occasions it might be better to ask around what’s available among friends before going out and buying something you only get to wear once. Shopping your friends closet’s is a pretty new concept to me but one I find fairly exciting! Of course it’s all about reciprocating, if I borrow cloths I open up my closet to potential lenders as well. I am ok with that.

Friday afternoon I also logged into my Facebook account for the last time. It took a while to copy out all the contact details and photos I wanted to keep (FB actually has a download copy of data function which is so handy!). Then I had to google how to permanently delete your account (since FB hides the button apparently so you can only find it when you do a search --> a clever way of making deletion just tricky enough to deter some people!). And tada! I am now FB free, or at least my profile will disappear in 14 days! Pressing the delete button was hard! I will admit to feeling a bit stressed about it and worried I might miss info and people. After it was done though I now feel relaxed and do not regret the decision or feel the need to log on quickly to cancel the deletion (as mentioned above, FB gives you a 14 day window before deletion actually occurs so you can still change your mind). There is no going back though!

All in all, I feel happier at work, more relaxed in general and look better. Smiles all round :)

Another weekend

Another weekend has come and gone! I did almost nothing this weekend, biggest contributing factor was the weather which was dismal! I started a new book and spent most of my time reading, even reading in bed since it was warmer under the blankets. Our kitty agreed, she must have been very cold because she came and crawled in under the blankets with me and spent the time snoozing, stretched out all along my leg.

I did remove a few more items from my wardrobe, patch up a torn pair of jeans that I used to wear almost every day and came to the realisation I have no useable winter clothes for Europe. All my jumpers are fairly light and I own no gloves or woolly hats. This is a slight problem since we are going to France in December to celebrate our wedding with all my Fiancés family who couldn’t make it to CT. When I left Europe (some 4 years ago now) I vowed never to return during winter so I chucked all my winter gear. Opps. However, as part of the minimalism ideal I will not now go out and buy some winter kit. I will ask around if I can lend stuff from some friends and maybe borrow some items from my Fiancés sister while there (this would actually be fantastic because then I don’t even need to pack it and schlep it there and back!). tada! Quick thinking :)

Otherwise I’ve been thinking I need to try and focus on one thing at a time. I have a tendency to over reach and then not get anything done. At the moment here’s what I am busy with and what I was thinking about tackling:

1.       Work (8hrs a day)

2.       Studying (I have a big assignment due in three weeks so about an hour a day at least required here)

3.       De-cluttering (trying to simplify our flat and lifestyle)

4.       Gym and swimming

5.       Eating healthy (I wanted to tackle a no-sugar diet)

6.       Meditation (would love to start)

7.       Gardening – start a small herb garden in a vacant plot in the communal garden of our building (I already have permission from other owners)

8.       Volunteer work --> I’ve been thinking about where and what. I think teaching Maths would be the most personally rewarding for me.

9.       Chemical free life – Make my own cleaning products and toiletries

I’ve realised it’s all too much and too soon! I need to take smaller steps if I want lasting change. I’ve thus decided to nix the sugar free diet (although I will try and cut down a bit I won’t be so strict), the gardening, meditation and volunteer work for now.

Instead I will try and re-focus on the simplifying of life, including the chemical-free ideal and a bit more exercise. That’s not to say that I won’t get around to the other stuff though! I am quite excited about my sister coming over end October. She’s been doing her own veggie garden for a few years now so I am hoping she can get me started with the gardening.